How many puppies are there inside?

My parents have money. A lot of money but that’s not surprising when you deny yourself and kids of everything.

For a whole year I was obsessed with wanting to be the owner of a puppy surprise dog. Lots of kids had one of these.

I was at Amy Minogue’s birthday party when I got up close to one. The poor mummy dog though was tossed to the side while the puppies were lined up neatly watching the television.

I thought that if I had one my life would be set. I’d need nothing more. This was the answer and the key to my happiness. Here Amy was with the definition of happiness and she wasn’t tending to the needs of the mother puppy who had just given birth. I was fuming.

How could someone with no respect have these precious little puppies and their mum under their care. For months I stewed over the mistreatment. I should have dog-napped them when I had the chance.

Fast forward to the present and I am finally getting my precious puppies and their mother. I’d been searching on ebay for months trying to find the perfect one but it’s not a surprise if you know how many puppies are inside. It was all very disheartening.

My Ellie pup has gotten herself into some strike. She left her milkshake in the yard, the boys came and then she became pregnant. Apart from not knowing the father of her new unborn babies, Ellie didn’t know how many precious little bundles of joy she would be welcoming into the world.

After meeting Ellie I performed the all important c-section. Carefully I pulled apart the Velcro. There was one, two, three little puppy heads. Ellie was doing well under the circumstances.

With a sigh of relief I took the last puppy from her. She is now sitting with her puppies, warm and comfortable and watching television. I’m worried about how I keep Ellie and her babies away from my redneck-torture-children. I don’t want to have to lock her in the cupboard but I might have to.

These types of things aren’t the type of things you tell your mental health people about. They scribble really fast on their notepads when you say things like this.

I totally have a puppy surprise! This feels all too exciting. Next toy want is those McDonald foods that transformers.

I sure am proud of Ellie and her pretty puppies.

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